Student teaching

student teaching It's official. I've finally decided for certain to drop out of clinical practice (student teaching). My mental and physical health has been bad, and I really just don't like it. I don't want to do it any longer. I'm sorry to those I disappoint, but I'm doing this for me and only me. I can no longer do it because my friends and family want me to. Below is what I e-mailed to all my teachers and mentors. It gives a little more of my reasoning.

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I have decided to withdraw from Clinical Practice. I appreciate all the support and time that my teachers and mentors have put into me for preparation into being a teacher. I can't tell you how many people have touched my life and made me appreciate those in this fine profession. These teachers truly are inspirational.

My main reason that I am withdrawing is that I really haven't been enjoying my time in a classroom. Also, my stress and anxiety levels have been too much. It has been negatively affecting my health in multiple ways. I suspect that my ulcer has gotten much worse due to this, and I really need to focus on my health right now.

I continued pushing into student teaching for the wrong reasons, because I realized during the end of the school year last year that I didn't want to do it. I did it because 1- I was almost done, 2- my parents were pushing me to do it, and 3- I like to finish what I start.

I feel like I gave this semester my all and that I sincerely tried to be a good teacher. I appreciate all the support I have gotten for it, but I need to think more about my health and my future right now. Thank you for your time.

Student teaching has been kicking my butt. By the way, I'm at PG High, and I really like the teachers there. They're awesome and I'm certainly learning quite a bit.

It is terrifying, especially because I REALLY don't want to be there most days. I feel so unprepared and am so confused in what I'm doing. I can only hope that I'll get more confident and figure this stuff out, because I certainly don't feel like I am.

Today was my 10th day, and the university supervisor wants to come observe me on Friday. And she wants to come during the biggest choir. It's kinda... bad. What's worse is that I have NO idea what the student's names are in that choir. They don't take roll call and I didn't get to personally meet them all. Oh, and my teacher doesn't have a seating chart for me yet, so mostly, I'm just pretty dang lost.

Each day I'm in front of the groups I feel like I just really suck at teaching. I don't do classroom management well enough, so it's hard to keep them on track. I don't know how to go about teaching concepts yet, which is rough. Also, I just mostly don't know what I'm doing. Hopefully I'll figure it out.

Work is really stressing me out right now too. We have a new assistant manager that is killing us. She's so mean and doesn't trust us. Mostly she ONLY wants us to do what she tells us to. It's freaking annoying! And she doesn't give us the chance to do audits, or anything else that isn't up front with the schedule, responding, or stocking 82s (checkout stuff). It's ridiculous. That and she's mean about it and has ZERO respect for us as supervisors. Luckily the cashiers and other people under us don't have to deal with the crap we do, at least yet. Needless to say, I put in for the part time vision center position, and I hope I get it. I so want out.

And, that's about it. I hope everyone is doing better than I, because I CAN'T function on 6 hours of sleep, no matter what I do. I'm a zombie. Not a good brain eating zombie though... just a stupid drooling one. Ah well.

Oh, and I'm supposed to play cello at a wedding too. One more thing that I can't find time for. Boo.